March 8^th is the shared birthday of two the late 90’s/early 00’s most influential pop-culture titans. That’s right, James Van Der Beek Jr. (28) and Freddie Prinze, Jr. (29) will both be blowing candles (and maybe each other) out today.

In order to determine who is the better junior, and also who gets the piece of cake w/ the most icing, I thought I’d present a little showdown and find out which one has the better life. The idea of Beek vs. Prinze is not a new one, as it has been hotly debated for centuries which one could do the most push-ups and pull in the most statutory tail.

Let’s get on with the show…

Physical Attractiveness:

While Van Der Beek is no slouch in the sexiness category, it’s hard to compete with Freddie here. The dark, mysterious eyes, chiseled facial structure and boyish charm (I have no idea) are just too much to compete with. I polled (poled) several females and they all concurred, unanimously selecting Prinze, Jr. as the hottest. There you have it.

Winner: Freddie

Acting Resume:

TOUGH. While Freddie has landed teen epics such as I Know What You Did Last Summer, I Still Know What You Did Last Summer, Scooby Doo, Scooby Doo 2, and She’s All That, Van Der Beek was known to most of the Western World as Dawson Leery for six years but hasn’t made much of a splash on the big screen. That is, of course, if you manage to forget one of, if not THE best movie of our generation: Varsity Blues (I’m seriously not even joking). Compared with Prinze’s sports offering, Summer Catch, it single-handedly gives The Beek the upper-hand.

Winner: The Beek

Love Interest:

James is married to Heather McComb from “Party of Five.” I never watched that show, so I have no idea who she is. But if this picture is any indication, my only reaction can be... GOO!!! On the other hand, Freddie’s wife is none other than “Buffy,” aka Sarah Michelle Gellar, who I think is overrated, but still hot enough to give Freddie the victory.

Winner: Freddie

Little-known Facts:

Van Der Beek – identified dyslexic in kindergarten. He started acting because a concussion caused him to quit football. He likes the Packers. His favorite group is Dave Matthews Band and his favorite ice cream is vanilla.

Prinze – collects comic books. He is 1/4 Puerto Rican, 1/4 Hungarian and 1/2 Italian. He enjoys Enjoys martial arts, swimming, and recently took up tap dancing.

Winner: The Beek (overcoming dyslexia is courageous - he is the Lance Armstrong of acting)

Future Outlook:

The Beek recently scored a lead role in a CBS comedy pilot “Three” where he will play ½ of a newlywed couple. I have no more details about this. On the other hand, Prinze, Jr. has four films coming out this year. Two of them are animated and one of them is entitled Pool Hall Prophets. “Plot outline: A street-smart pool player falls in with a pack of hustlers. As he rises in the underground circuit, he lands in the middle of a match between his boss and a crooked cop.” This leaves me with only one question: Is there going to be a midnight showing on opening day? If so, I’m there.

Winner: Freddie (I guess)

Overall:

If you are good at math, you will notice that Freddie Prinze, Jr. won three out of five categories. In most contests this would constitute a victory. However, The Beek was in Varsity Blues, and Jon Moxon’s only one man.

Winner: THE BEEK.

Congratulations to our finalists, may your respective careers rest in peace.

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