Well, it’s Tuesday. The Around-the-World Party was Saturday. I think I still have a headache.

I’m not a scientologist, so I have no idea what causes hangovers other than that they are somehow related to the consumption of a buttload of alcohol. What I do know is that I don't enjoy the feeling of not being able to stand vertically until 5:00 p.m. following a night of
inebriation. I’m pretty sure everyone reading this proabably feels the same.

Anyway, my liver has been naughty lately so on Saturday night I took it upon myself to give it a stern beating, and hopefully it learned its lesson. Another one of my body’s organs got a stern beating on Saturday as well, but I don’t think that my mom would be proud of me anymore if I gave you any details about that.

The above picture is a wall in my bedroom that I let people sign @ the party and if you look closely, you will see zero drawings of penises, breasts, nor any mammalian sexual organ whatsoever. I was very unpleasantly surprised and disappointed in my friends who I thought were as immature as I am. Posers. Also, to the gentleman who gave me his telephone number: I’m flattered, but I don’t swing that way… for less than $50.

According to several eyewitnesses, later that night I apparently passed out in mid-sentence while talking to my friends in my living room – standing upright, mind you – crashed to the floor, coming dangerously close to putting my head right through the not-HI-DEF TV. Nobody had ever seen anything like that before and for my head’s sake, hopefully no one sees anything like that again. Although I'm sticking to the mantra of "If I don’t remember it, it didn’t happen."

Today I vowed to not drink for the rest of the quarter, mostly to save money but also to save the few remaining brain cells that I’m still clinging to. That vow took place at about noon. Six hours later, I was at the bar having a few Labatts. All Canadian beer is non-alcoholic, right? Nuts. Alright, no drinking anymore. Starting… NOW.

Hangover Links:

Hungover.net – I think they are supposed to have cures for hangovers, but the site’s color combinations make my head hurt even more than it already does so I didn’t even get past the main page.

So You Wanna Cure a Hangover? – I don’t feel like reading this. You probably won’t either.

Chaser – A pill you can take to cure your hangover. “Does not prevent intoxication.”

Anti-Hangover Tips – “There is one preventive measure that is absolutely foolproof for every person in the world: Don't ever drink. You'll be guaranteed to avoid hangovers for the rest of your life.” Not Bloody Likely.

The Non-Alcoholic Hangover – Helps non-drinkers deal with the effects of “secondhand heavy drinking.” Also helps them deal with being complete losers. Weak.

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